Guest post by Michelle Nickolaisen

As a friend once told me – “The Sex Pistols were basically all about being big wankers (my friend was British, by the way), the Ramones were pretty much about having a good time, and the Clash was about trying to change the world.”

That’s a pretty good summary. Those three bands could arguably be called the foundation of most of the punk rock music in existence today, and they showed three different ways to do it. You can probably guess which one is my favorite, going off the title of this post.

The Clash did things their way. They talked about the issues that they wanted to talk about in their songs. In Career Opportunities, Joe sings:

The offered me the office, offered me the shop
They said I’d better take anything they’d got
Do you wanna make tea at the BBC?
Do you wanna be, do you really wanna be a cop?

Sound like a familiar message?

Throughout their career, the Clash questioned or outright broke several of the “rules” of punk rock (if there were such a thing) and of the music industry in general.

While the Sex Pistols were wearing swastikas for shock value, Joe Strummer (front man of the Clash) was quoted as saying “I think people ought to know that we’re anti-fascist, anti-violence, and anti-racist. We’re against ignorance.”

They insisted on having Bo Diddley open for them on their 1979 US tour. A 51 year old blues/rock musician wasn’t necessarily the expected opening act for a punk rock band, but that’s who the Clash wanted.

After two fairly straightforward releases that were both punk in style, their third release (London Calling) mixed influences as diverse as punk, reggae, ska, and rockabilly. Sandinista!, their next album, was a triple LP and the band had a heated debate with the record label about the prices, finally managing to get it priced the same as a single LP album so that fans could afford it. Rumor has it that the band surrendered all of the royalties for the first 200,000 copies to make Sandinista! a reality. The album went on to be hailed by critics and was listed on Alternative Press’s 2000 list of “10 Essential Political-Revolution Albums”.

They headlined at the first Rock Against Racism event. And in a 2002 interview, Joe Strummer said “…punk rock means exemplary manners to your fellow human beings” which isn’t a very popular view (but is certainly an interesting one!).

Billy Bragg, a celebrated musician in his own right, said “Were it not for the Clash, punk would have been just a sneer, a safety pin, and a pair of bondage trousers.”

Absolutely everyone’s heard of the Ramones and the Sex Pistols, true. But who still has a niche of incredibly devoted fans, over thirty years after their first release? Yeah. That’s the Clash.

Lessons learned:

• Don’t be afraid to break the rules.
• But don’t just break the rules for the sake of breaking ‘em. Have a mission and a message.
• Shock value isn’t everything.
• Don’t be afraid of disagreement. Stick to your guns.
• Last but not least, put people first.

And one last quote for the road:

I’d like to say people can change anything they want to; and that means everything in the world.

Guest post by Logan Zanelli

Recently, I got an e-mail from Mazza Harrington that caught my eye.

Mazza is on a crusade to shake up the classical music scene (which is awesome), and is a self-described partier and smoker, who “gets drunk and has weird constantly evolving haircuts which are definitely non-classical.”

Now what caught my attention in this e-mail was what Mazza said about classical music:

“The industry desperately needs some players with rock-star attitude and the majority are too frightened to move out of the status quo – daring to be different.

Bin the penguin suits, close the concert halls, max out use of the social media, burn the academics at the stake and seek sponsorship with Levis, say I.”

And you know what? THAT’s the coolest punk rock twist on classical music I’ve ever heard.

Which got me thinking.

Every industry, niche, and genre has it’s own rockstars. And some of them have nothing to do with rock ‘n roll.

That means when it comes to your business, you could be a guy making performance racing parts in his garage and have a huge following of fans, or a little old granny knitting in a rocking chair, and totally have a rockstar online business selling “granny’s designer wool socks” (can you even knit those?).

In other words, it doesn’t matter what your business is. What does matter is that you believe that you (yes, you) can be the type of rockstar that people will go all fan-boy over (insert gaggles of squealing and screaming teenage girls here).

So what makes you that kind of rockstar?

Your attitude

“Being a rockstar is part image, and part attitude.” – Bret Michaels

We’ve all seen examples of what happens when someone tries to fake their way through being a rockstar. Either they get exposed for their lip-synching or they produce albums that are auto-tuned disasters.

The same thing could happen to your business.

Without the right attitude, you can have the best brand image in the world and still look like a hack.

You need the attitude that goes along with the image. And it starts with having confidence in yourself.

- You need to believe you can do it.
- You need to believe you provide something valuable.
- You need to believe that there are people out there that want what you have.

But most importantly, you need to believe that you have just as much right to be “on stage” as any A-Lister in your niche.

Part of having a rockstar attitude is adopting a “devil may care” attitude. One that says, “this is who I am, this is what I do. Deal with it.” Then charge full speed ahead, and don’t let anyone make you feel inferior to them.

Being a rockstar means you’re a little bit badass, a little bit rebel, have some cavalier attitude in you, and carry yourself with confidence.

Apply that to your business, and you’d be amazed at how quickly you can shoot to the top of your niche.

Your passion

Attitude without passion is just an inflated ego. You need to be passionate about what you do in order for your attitude to be a magnet that attracts fans.

Take another look at what Mazza said about changing classical music…

“…Bin the penguin suits, close the concert halls, max out use of the social media, burn the academics at the stake and seek sponsorship with Levis, say I.”

That is a great example of a rockstar attitude born of an intense passion for classical music.

And just like Mazza, you want your passion to be the foundation of your rockstar attitude. It should ignite it, fuel it, and sustain it so your business will continue to flourish for years to come.

Your stage presence

Do you know how to carry yourself like a rockstar?

In order for people to respect you as an expert on your topic, and view you as an authority they can learn from, you have to present yourself in a manner that is consistent with someone they would look up to.

That means learning how to “wear” fame or notoriety with confidence and poise, and not publish information that damages your credibility as an expert.

For example, if you’re a marketing consultant and you gripe on twitter about not having any clients, who’s going to hire you? If you can’t market yourself well enough to get clients, how could you possibly help them?

Having stage presence also means seeing yourself as the teacher rather than the student.

Once you shift your mentality from “I’m just an amateur, who would want to learn from me?” to “I’m a professional at what I do, and have information that’s worth sharing,” you’ll be able to step up your game, bring more value to your audience, and connect with more people who can effectively promote you.

The bottom line

You don’t have to like rock music to be a rockstar. But, if you want to dominate your niche and assume the role of “rockstar” in your industry, you have to adopt a rockstar attitude that positions you as the badass fans flock to and want to follow fanatically.

By injecting some attitude, passion, and stage presence into your business, you’ll be able to launch yourself to the top of your niche faster than you can imagine.

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Logan Zanelli is the author of “How to Go from Boring to Rockstar in 30 Days,” a course that teaches you how to build a unique style and become the “rockstar” of your niche.

By Yael Grauer

(With apologies to Robert Fulghum)

Seven of the biggest things I need to know about how to live and what to do, how to work and how to be, I learned from punk rock. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate school mountain, but right there in the record store, at the latest show, in my basement and in between the pages of MAXIMUMROCKNROLL.

These are the things I learned:

1. Share resources.

Sometimes it’s fun to pretend you’re the only person who’s ever listened to your five favorite obscure bands and that anyone who people you’re not friends with has heard of is a sell-out. But at a certain point (like when you’re at the show all by yourself, or screaming on a soapbox in the shower, listening to your own echoes)
it’s not really fun anymore. Passing along the name of your favorite zine or band to someone who might be interested is always a good idea.

2. It’s okay to have a platform.

Like many punk rockers, I’ve always felt a smidgen uncomfortable with being the center of attention or being looked at as an authority figure. When I teach writing workshops, I always try to give the power bestowed upon me back to the class participants–giving them permission to either follow convention or break it; whichever is
calling to them.

But while authoritarianism is a bad thing, having a platform isn’t. Punk rock bands may invite audience members on stage or hand them the mic, they might play in a basement instead of on a stage or spend considerable amounts of time rocking out amidst the audience–but they don’t apologize for having something to say.

3. In the words of one Ian Mackaye, “Don’t be no fuckin’ assholes to each other.

” Punk rockers may look super tough with their five zillion safety pins and piercings, bedazzled leather jackets and badass mohawks, but the ones that hit people in the mosh pit or try to start shit get kicked out or worse. What goes around comes around, and the community is fiercely protective.

4. Find your audience. Or pack. Whatever you want to call it.

When, at the age of 13, I eagerly played my grandmother a Redd Kross CD, she told me it sounded like animals fighting in the night. For some reason I thought she’d prefer it to my other musical selections, but as a classically trained musician she wasn’t feeling it. That doesn’t make Redd Kross any less epic.

The great thing about punk rock is that there is something for everybody–or even every part of one’s personality. I grew up listening to Bikini Kill, Bratmobile and Heavens to Betsy for my riot grrrrl fix, to the Ramones and Screeching Weasel for boppy tunes and to the Subhumans and Sex Pistols so I could indulge in angry politics. This along with local Creep Records bands like Buglite and the Halflings. There is room for every sub-genre imaginable.

5. Don’t be too picky about your audience, though.

Some riot grrrls and I decided to put on a show at the Killtime in Philly (on 38th and Lancaster) back in 1995, and we decided to go to South Street to hand out flyers. The girls I was with said they didn’t want to hand them out to everyone, though, only people that “were worthy.” They’d only made about 20 copies, and needless to say, none of the worthy people showed up and the bands didn’t get paid. Punk rock is about accessibility and d.i.y. spirit, not about exclusivity and cliques–despite what some people might think.

6. Do it yourself.

Perhaps the most important lesson I learned from punk rock was not to sit around and wait for someone to do something for me, or to give me permission to do it. I started a zine when I was in 7th grade and learned to write in the process (and didn’t get published in a national magazine until I was 17), I started a label on my own which was a massively failed experiment, and I listened to some great bands that didn’t wait for a label  to appear from the heavens with a six-figure contract before they started playing shows or recording music. It is the d.i.y. ethic that has allowed me to succeed as a creative entrepreneur, charting my own path and making adjustments along the way. Homemade art is always infinitely more enjoyable than mass-produced cookie cutter content.

7. Take criticism with a grain of salt and remember that even bad publicity can be good publicity.

“This zine sucks so much shit it oozes out of the pages.” So said a reviewer for a now-defunct zine called Methyltribenzine. “What are you a little kid or something?” he added, ending with “the least you could do is write neatly.” So the guy apparently didn’t like the zine I’d sent in for review. Surprisingly, the letters of support streamed in, and I got a handful of orders from that bad review–carefully sealed envelopes with two bucks and two stamps, bearing notes with words of encouragement such as “that review sucked, but most reviewers suck.”

Think of what a better world it would be if we all — the whole world — shared resources with other people who found them useful, did things ourselves instead of waiting for our knight in shining armor and used our platform to express ourselves.. Or if we had a basic policy in our nation and other nations to not be fucking assholes to each other. And think of how many businesses would be saved if we all took criticism with a grain of salt. And it is still true, no matter how old you are or what kind of music you listen to, that when you go out into the world, if you do not howl you will never find your pack.

Yael Grauer is a freelance writer and editor. Drop her a line at yael@yaelwrites.com if you’d like help in any aspect of content creation, proofreading and editing or copywriting.

Guest post by Conrad Walton

Lunch last Thursday was with a group of people I used to work with in a previous life.

It was a huge aerospace corporation, the largest. The rules said that when you graduate from college, you’re supposed to get a job with a big company. I thought it gave me security and status and good money.

I was wrong.

After being laid off, my next job had a 20% raise and I was making double my salary within a couple of years as a web developer. I had mad skills that could get me a job anywhere. I had more money and more security after I left. Getting laid off was the best thing that ever happened to me.

That place took 13 years of my life. Would it be too melodramatic to say that it took a little piece of my soul? OK, then let’s just say that I hated working there. I passionately hated working there.

(Cleansing breath. In and Out. Good.)

But Now I’m Found

Being in the same room with a lot of those people for lunch stirred up those memories. A lot of the people did the best they could in the given situation. Some were great leaders and others were great friends. Some were just stupid.

I compared those 13 years of my life to the last 12 years of my life, being a web developer for various companies and making money in my own business.

It was like looking at two different people. Did I really used to be that guy?

It took me 13 years to realize that I’m not a corporate dude. I had trouble “finding myself”, but that’s because I wasn’t looking. I didn’t realize that I was lost.

Follow Your Bliss

I guess I can turn this into the obvious “find your bliss and follow it”, but I don’t think it’s that easy.

“Follow your bliss” is more like “Stumble through the dark trying to find the road without getting hit by a car”.

I did the exercise in the “What Color Is Your Parachute?” book to find out what I would like, before I got that job. I rationally decided that I would like that job. I didn’t. I don’t think you can find out who you are only by rational analysis.

I don’t think anyone can just go sit in a meadow, watch a rainbow, and figure out who they want to be, not really.

Try Stuff And Fail

It takes trying stuff and failing. Trying some other stuff and being surprised by something totally unexpected, then trying that. There’s the whole “self awareness” thing, but you have to add real life experiences.

It’s the dance between who you are and real life. What happens to you and what situation you are in are huge factors. That whole “web developer” job description did not exist when I started that job. I had to keep my eyes open and look at what was happening around me.

Dream Big

It helps to sit down and dream.

Dream wild. Dream big. Dream dangerous.

Throw off the shackles of people’s expectations and the oppression of societal norms and fly free!

OK, wait. I got carried away. Let’s not get crazy here.

Maybe you should just talk to a friend over beers about what they think you should do. If you can’t make the grand gesture, maybe you should just make a small one. Baby steps. Maybe you really should go sit in a meadow. Whatever works. Do a little thinking about what you REALLY want to do. Question your own rules.

When you’re done thinking about it, and you have an idea of who you are, try stuff. Then try something else. You never know what you’ll find or where you’ll end up.

The Cliches (because they’re true!)

Keep trying and don’t get distracted by banality. Implementation is everything. Life is a series of course corrections. Keep moving.

If there were no rules, what would you want to do? Who are you, really?

Conrad Walton was raised in captivity on the corporate cube farms. He’s now a free range web developer and does SEO. He wrote The Simple Guide To SEO. He’s happily married to Victoria and has a cat named Spike. Follow him on Twitter @conradwalton

Guest post by Rebecca Kellogg

Before our pre-move “spring cleaning,” the game closet held no fewer than five chess sets of all sizes. The smallest set had tiny little pieces. The medium sets were your average everyday discount-drugstore chess sets. But the biggest one was something else . . . it had hand-crafted marble pieces and a roll-out mat.

Guess which one my chess lover always wanted to pick for our games?

A regular chess set has detailed enough pieces that a beginner can pick out the difference between a bishop and the queen. The board folds in half. It serves its purpose. A big chess set, on the other hand, has highly detailed pieces that are solid. Cool to the touch. Fun to hold and to look at. And the mat can be rolled up and used as a telescope. Not your average, every-day chess set. But really fun to play. Hands down, we picked it the most often. Ever seen those life-sized chess sets? Think of the chess sets in Alice in Wonderland, or Harry Potter. Those are really big games. Those things are HUGE. And the people playing are fully engaged in a colorful game large as life. They are enthralled. They can’t help it.

Playing a life-sized game is kind of like that. When you choose a life-sized game, you are choosing a game that is different than the average, everyday game that life will offer you if you hold still and take what’s coming to you. What a rush and a treasure. We each choose the size of game we want to play, the level of impact we want to have, the sphere we want to engage with. Or we don’t choose, and let the world decide for us.

I’m gonna challenge you to question the rules. Do you want to play a bigger game? Who says you can’t? Here are three mindset hacks I’ve found that help when learning to play life-sized chess.

1. Hang out near the big chess sets.
Surround yourself with positive achievers. Don’t like the people you hang out around? Choose a new crowd. When you get stuck, ask yourself what your positive, achieving friends would do in your situation. If you’re still stuck, ask your positive, achieving friends point blank what they would do in your situation. (Hint: Make sure you’re hanging out at games you want to play. If you want to learn to play life-sized chess, don’t hang out around a game of life-sized Parcheesi.)

2. Watch the masters of the game—consider hiring a coach who is successful at the skill you want to gain.
Everyone is born with natural gifts and talents, but if you think you’re stuck forever at your current level, I would like to challenge that assumption. Before you give in to mediocrity, or give up on reaching the level you’d like to play, remember there are teachers and mentors and consultants out there who have helped folks just like you find a more exciting path to follow.

You’ve probably heard it before, but hiring a good player—a chess master if you will—to help your game is one of the fastest ways to improve yourself. (And much faster than the trial-and-error method, though there’s a lot to be said for experience.) It’s takes guts to admit there’s room to grow and seek out an effective teacher, but learning is an important part of the journey, grasshopper.

3. Practice what you are learning.
Remember the movie “Searching for Bobby Fischer”? To refresh your memory:

A kid learns from a great chess teacher. He competes in a bunch of matches. He comes up against competition and obstacles. When he decides to get serious, he buckles down and focuses on mastering the game. It takes practice for him to execute on what he’s been learning and reach top competitive form. It takes practice for ANY of us to execute on what we’ve been learning and reach top competitive form.

Let me tell you the story of a remarkable woman. As a copywriter and marketing strategist, I work with people and businesses that want to take their game to the next level. One client who inspired me with the size of the game she plays was Tera. Tera started a multi-city organization for women entrepreneurs.

With her permission, I’ll share a bit of her story.

At one time, Tera worked in a multi-level marketing business. She did very well. She won a national award. But when she went on stage to accept her award, she realized something interesting about herself. Rather than accepting awards she would prefer to be the one giving them out. Back in her local city, Tera decided that the women she would like to be around—the women she would like to be rewarding—were women who owned their own businesses. So she started a group for women entrepreneurs.

The group she set up had annual memberships with benefits and monthly events at the swankest venue in town. The events got rave reviews. Women entrepreneurs could come learn and work on their businesses. They could network and make friends with other high achievers. Discussion time at the events started with questions designed to get people talking about how they could help one another—thus encouraging people to give first before asking, and also encouraging people to support one another. Tera started getting comments from visitors: “There should be a group like this in every city!” and “I wish we had a group like this in my town.” So she decided to take things to the next level. She systematized her processes. And created a program to help women form entrepreneur groups in their own cities.

Tera decided she was a chess master, then took actions to make reality fit her internal assessment. Who decided she was a leader? She did. The decision to play life-sized chess is a personal one. Maybe you’re happy watching, or being a hobbyist. Or playing a small game. But perhaps you really do want something bigger. Are you willing to reach for it? What actions are you taking to reach your goals today?

Maybe you CAN’T have everything you wish for . . . but if you don’t choose a few things you’d really like to do and take serious action on those, you’ll always be stuck playing a miniature game. When we moved, we decided we didn’t want five chess sets. We were getting rid of a lot of stuff that we didn’t really need. Guess which set we picked to take along during the next leg of our journey? (Hint: You can roll up the board and use it like a telescope.)

Rebecca Kellogg is a copywriter and marketing consultant who blogs online at http://rebeccakellogg.com. Her favorite board game is a large Scrabble set. Rebecca writes copy and gives marketing advice to businesses lacking a copywriter.

Guest post by Jennifer Bones

I have a long history of questioning rules. I grew up in a radically liberal and politically active household. I considered myself a rebel and a renegade. Questioning the rules was my “thing,” it’s what I did best. As a teenager and young adult, I was well-known for doing things my friends thought were brave but my parents knew were stupid.

During my twenties, finding myself alone with two young children, I defied the rules and went back to college. Finding myself lost in a sea of cubicles some years later, I questioned authority again and walked away from my career (and a six-figure income). And I felt pretty cool about all this. I was the coolest person I knew, or so I thought, until the thinly-iced floor finally fell out from under me.

Through a series of seemingly unfortunate events (the details of which I’ll spare you) this time last year I left my life-long home, family and friends in the Philadelphia suburbs to stay with a virtual stranger in the metro-Detroit area. In what seemed like an instant, this once-successful, always-unstoppable questioner of the status quo found herself with a few black trash bags full of clothes and eighty-seven cents in her pocket, driving through the night away from everything she knew and loved into the dark abyss of the unknown.

Needless to say my bravado and rebellious nature were immediately and severely tested and, of course, they didn’t hold up as much as I’d hoped. As a matter of fact most days it was all I could do not to sink into a corner, shivering with fear, and pray aloud for a pair of ruby slippers to make everything OK again. While the slippers never came, some sense did begin to return to me (thanks in no small part to an army of amazingly supportive friends).

Stripped down to nothing, my life took on a strange hue I’d never seen before. No one else had put me in this situation. There was no authority to rail against, no leader to defy. Shit, there was only me. My friend from Detroit provided me with a safe haven, a cocoon, in the hopes I’d get through this difficult time and come out the other side transformed. I had food, shelter and a sparkly new computer. Here it was, a completely fresh start. What everyone dreams of. Awesome. Sort of.

It all weighed down upon me like an enormous blank slate. Like the writer’s blank page or the artist’s blank canvas…only fucking *huge.* A looming white neon sign advertising nothing, anticipating failure. Having always wanted to be a writer, I began working on what I thought would be a good idea for a novel. My plan was to throw myself into it and see what would come of it. At the very least, it would help keep me sane and put the new computer to some use.

Astonishingly and completely unexpectedly, a few weeks later I landed a job writing articles for a large online supplier. A couple weeks after that I started my blog and within a month I was working with some clients of my own. Thus my freelance business was born and it didn’t take long to realize that unless I dealt with a few nagging issues, I wasn’t going to get very far.

The time had come to question MY rules. I don’t mean beliefs, ethics or morals, my repertoire devoid of such luxuries. I mean those bullshit stories we tell about, and to, ourselves in the dark reaches of our minds. The ones that have been there so long we don’t remember there ever being peace and quiet in our heads. The ones that tell you you’re not worth it, or you’ll fail, or you’re fat, stupid, ugly…whatever.

I had to get over the thoughts that making good money was bad, that I was undisciplined and could never be gainfully self-employed, that no one would buy my services or that I’d be found-out as some fraud (of what kind I’ve no idea…but that part of the mind is not known for its rationality). I had to overcome the fear that nobody, anywhere would give a shit what I had to say.

This bad-ass rebel suddenly discovered the only thing standing between her and her dreams was herself and that had been the case all along. Ouch. Make no mistake, it was a brutal and messy process. It’s a good thing I was relatively secluded for the duration. But it’s precisely when I (finally) became willing to venture deep and live intentionally, my life really began to transform. Possibilities seemed to fall like rain out of nowhere. Opportunities opened up all around me.

Truly an amazing experience and it hasn’t let up for a second so far. I mean for fucks sake, here I am writing this to you and there you are reading it! When we question authority or defy the norm, although it becomes necessary to do so at times, it always comes at a cost. Doing things differently, we have no control over closed doors. It puts up roadblocks, sometimes useful ones, but blockages nonetheless. But by defying standards, the ones we create and have total control over, we open up whole new dimensions of ideas, possibilities and pathways we never even considered before. Boundaries and blockades melt away and the thought of “being realistic” suddenly seems as ridiculous as it should.

So what rules of your own have you questioned lately? What stories have you revised about yourself?

Jenny Bones is a freelance copy writer and internet marketing consultant for home based business owners. Visit her blog for mindful musings on writing, marketing, transformations and how to get shit done online.

Guest post by Martin Stellar

Johnny’s note: I fought back and forth a bit about this post because it’s so fucking odd, and also because there’s a lot of “talking about me” that happens in here — which, believe it or not, makes me uncomfortable most of the time. But I ultimately decided I had to run it because 1) I’ve gotten to know Martin fairly well and HE is fucking odd, so anything he sent was going to make me question my sanity (see our upcoming sequel course, “Question the Sanity”), 2) both my wife Robin and right-hand gal Amy thought it was hilarious, and 3) it seriously “questions the rules” about the way most guest posts are written and succeeds beautifully in doing so once you accept that you’re in some kind of altered Martin-reality. So welcome down the rabbit hole, Alice.

…

Here is a little piece of total disclosure folks. I thought it would never happen, but I’m mad as hell, and Johnny deserves to be outed.

I am the REAL Johnny B. Truant.

That’s right, it’s time for the world to know who I really am.

Johnny is that really cool ballsy guy, right? The oh-so-funny genius, who does and says whatever he wants, to anybody he wants, AND he juggles fish. He’s got balls the size of a small planet, and he likes to show them to people in dark alleys. He’s constantly bragging about how he built a business in a way that would have made William Randolph Hearst hide in shame and ask for a quarter. Women swoon, guys want gender change operations, and half the internet seems to lick up to his virtual heels.

Johnny is so courageous and ballsy, he even outright asks for your money when he wants to go to a show. Because that’s just how big his balls are. Ha, I say. Ha. The only reason he did that is because he was afraid his wife was going to kick him in said balls when she found out he’d spent way to much on the tickets. Courage indeed…

Let me tell you the story of how Johnny got to be so successful and established.

It was ME who did all that.

I’m the guy behind the scenes, I’m the brains behind it all, and it was I who came up with the name Johnny B. Truant.

So why am I now ‘fessing up? You may think it’s yet another clever way for Johnny to create a story. It’s not. I’m upset. I’m really very angry.

Let me tell you the story.

You’ll have read that a few years ago, I had invested a small bank’s worth of money in real estate, in Cleveland. Then suddenly, the economy started to behave much in the same way Johnny’s big brass balls will behave if he doesn’t stop growing them soon: collapse under it’s own weight.

So I found myself with a family and bills and an absence of several thousands of dollars monthly that I urgently needed in order to avoid being in serious fucking trouble, because apparently, life thought that tits-up investment wasn’t enough trouble. You figure it out. No, actually, I’ve figured it out for you. I’ll tell you in a minute.

What to do?

I decided to create an alter ego and make him really really ballsy. Meet Johnny. All went well. People like me, they trust me, and by some weird cosmic fluke it worked. It took off, and within a year I was making some really good money.

(I’ve asked a quantum theorist about all of this, by the way. He said it’s probably a loose bit of string from a parallel universe that drifted into ours, attracted by the sheer gravitational mass my balls will have in a few years. I know — that hasn’t happened yet, but the guy says that neither have I. He also says that space is time, and time is space, so if you can move back through space, you can therefore also move back in time. Me, I think he’s nuts. There is no spoon, remember?)

Anyway, I started to spend time being Johnny. I started a blog, hooked up with some good company, and everything went swimmingly. Got over the hump and through the dip. Rockin’.

But there was a problem, and it got big. Fast. Like my balls.

I liked being Johnny. Too much. Way too much. At first it was nice. I felt like a kid who moved out of his doting parents’ home. A new town, people, bars, girls! I could be myself, do what I felt like, be irreverent and crazy as hell. That appealed to people, it worked wonders for business, and so I overindulged. I got addicted.

Where Johnny and I used to hang out in my skull and have hilarious conversations about zombie ninjas without pants, I now found myself increasingly unable to be myself. Johnny became such a strong and overpowering entity in my psyche, that I actually started feeling schizoid. Except I didn’t switch from being myself to being Johnny, I was both at the same time. My brain was just too crammed full and we started getting really vicious arguments.

At some point he pulled a Tyler Durden on me. He actually beat me up.

I told him I wasn’t his bitch and that he’d better simmer the fuck down or I would pull his plug. I made him up so I could also shut him down — and would shut down that nice, new, booming little business with it.

So he tried to kill me.

I’d spent enough time with him to know that when Johnny is angry, he means business. So I ran. I reported him to the police, it went to court, and right now we’re in a trial separation. I was evicted from our body and I’m not allowed anywhere near it, because the judge thought that I was a loony, and that it is ME who is the real threat.

So now I’m a homeless, disembodied mind and I’m looking for a nice person — not too old — to live under the scalp with. I’m thinking of a woman, because I’ve always wondered what it must be like to have boobs. Meanwhile, Johnny is wiling away MY days with MY wife, while the business which I built

with my own bare hands

within

a year

is buying him the martinis that I should be drinking by pools into which I should be jumping while wearing the tuxedos I should be wearing.

So. You understand why I’m so angry? But now the truth is out, and everybody will know it was me all along.

Again: Ha. Ha, I say.

What?

So with that, let’s get to the meat of this thing. And by meat, I mean gigantic balls. We’ll start with a few questions.

Have I got your attention?

Are you completely baffled?

Are you wondering who is who and what the hell this is all about?

Good. You are now receptive.

You are now ready to absorb a little idea about the most important thing in business. Don’t go thinking about trying to steal it as you read on, though, because I have it trademarked. I have a TM symbol and everything.

The one single thing you can not do without in business. Period.

Take this in folks. This could be to you what talking to Johnny was to me, half a year ago.

If you take this to heart, I guarantee you will see a shift in your business, and indeed in your life. It’s the one thing that everybody must have if they want to make it in business. Everything else is optional and up for debate and selection, from the color of your desk to the company you hire for your marketing. But this thing I’m about to explain has to be there. Has to.

I’ll explain:

I’m not Johnny B. Truant. I’m Martin Stellar. I teach people to BE their business and make it big, and I write stuff and whatnot. I also have a secret identity, but that’s, well… a secret. Johnny is Johnny, which means he is an entirely different person whom he is not. Yeah, read that again. Let me know if it doesn’t make sense.

The above is all a story. And not Johnny’s “Storyselling” kind of story. That was the untrue kind. The fun kind. The “balls” kind. Designed to demonstrate… well, to demonstrate what I’ll get to in a minute here.

(Incidentally you may think I should be worried, considering I can’t seem to stop talking about some guy’s balls. You may be right. Maybe choosing to be a woman from now on is the best idea after all.)

Grow some balls

Balls are quite definitely the single most important thing when you’re in business. Look at Johnny. He’s got an amazingly epic level of get-upness. The guy just oozes whoop-ass. He’s got a lot of courage.

He just went out there, and he did something pretty rare; he made a success of it in no time at all. Indeed, there is no spoon. Of course he was very lucky in many ways and got a lot of help, of course he’s more creative and crazy than most people, but none of that would have done him any good if he hadn’t mustered the courage to do what to him was the best idea at the time. And his idea was good, which was another stroke of luck, or genius, depending on your politics.

That most important thing you need in business? It’s balls. Giant, epic, balls.

What about you?

You have an idea. You have a business, a plan, you also want to make over $100,000 within a year, don’t you now, you sneaky little bugger? Maybe you’re a writer, or a programmer, or maybe you run a dancing school for rodents, or you sell cars. I don’t care, and it doesn’t matter.

I only care about one thing, and that is your success. (And my cat, because he invented yoga.)

Everybody — Johnny, you, me, absolutely everybody who is in business — must have a lot of panache if they’re going to be successful. And don’t give me no lip either: If you don’t have a whole bunch of your very own brand of get-up-ness, courage, hard work — and in short, balls — your chances for success are zero. You’re not the one girl in a million who doesn’t need deodorant, and neither are you the guy who strikes lucky and invents the paper clip. (Besides, that guy never saw any money from it anyway.)

Your idea may be revolutionary or promising, and your business may have oodles of potential, but you will need to do whatever it takes and be audacious if it’s going to kick ass and be a success.

You may need to be shaken up and switched on. Which is why I’m trashing Johnny. Kind of.

I’m giving Johnny shit because he needs it. Because we all need it. We all need something to keep challenging our spirits, to keep us mustering up the balls to keep doing what we need to do.

A similar thing happened to me. I needed bad stuff — in this case, despair — in order to get going. That’s where you may differ. I seriously hope that you don’t need the kind of situation that both Johnny and I needed in order to switch on. You may be a person who is naturally driven. Fine. But even then, you need exactly the same level of whoop-ass that anyone else needs. No matter your motivation, you still need those balls.

Johnny’s stuff inspired me. Talking to him and reading his posts was and remains a catalyst to me, so I got to work. And it started happening. I only started two months ago, and I’m in business. In fact, this morning I met with two really bright businesswomen, and we’re going to be setting up a something that will rock. Hard. And I’m writing for money. I’m consulting. I’m doing well.

Do you see the sense now in the title of this post? I needed balls, big ones, to start doing what I’m doing now and to make it work. I found my panache, I’m very happy to say.

Now it’s your turn. Switch on. Get the fuck down to work. Find your panache. Make some if you have to. Do it. Shine.

Say after me:

I am Johnny’s balls.

…

Martin Stellar is a writer, consultant, and ballsy business consistentialist. He’s the guy to talk to if you’re doing everything right and it still isn’t working. He’s also the guy to talk to if you want to write an outrageous article and get it published on an A-list blog. If that doesn’t work, he can custom-grow balls for you to flaunt on your own but you’d probably need spinal reinforcement. A spaceship would come in handy too, because black holes suck.

By Lee Stranahan

There’s a rule in marketing that you want your prospects and customers to always associate you with success. You want to deliver good feelings to them through calculated design, skilled copywriting and slick imagery.

This is the school of thought that leads to infomercials for real estate buying schemes that are filled with bikini clad women huddled around some prick’s successful entrepreneurship’s Ferrari that’s parked out in front of his McMansion. Give potential customers a taste of the good life and they will buy.

Those values — false values, really — have led the whole world into a lot of trouble, I think. But let’s at least be clear about what this technique is…it’s just a technique. It’s a way to get you to buy stuff.

So, here comes the part where I’m supposed to tell you that honest, authentic marketing is the way to go. I’m supposed to make a pitch for telling the truth and let you nod in agreement as you read with a private smugness about your moral superiority. I’m supposed to throw in that authentic marketing not only lets you sleep better at night but that it also WORKS better in the age of the internet and social media.

I’d love to tell you that telling the truth and being who you are is One True Path to success, happiness and kinkier sex.

Except…I can’t tell you that, either.

That Ferrari thing? It seems to work for some people. They associate themselves with success and they make a lot of money and I’m sure they sleep well, since nice mattresses are expensive.

And that authenticity thing? That seems to work for some people, too. They speak truth and lay it out there and reveal their angst and they make a lot of money and I’m sure they sleep well, too.

Just to confuse things even more, there are plenty of people for whom NEITHER of those things have ever worked. In fact, both of those strategies have resulted in outright disaster for some people and just general financial mediocrity and sleepless nights for many others.

Whatever you choose —  the Ferrari or the Truth Serum — some people aren’t going to like it and therefore they aren’t going to like you, either. They won’t trust you because you’re either a poser or a loser. They won’t buy your stuff and they will question the sanity and ethics of those who do.

I’m a Truth Serum guy. I pick risk and change consistently over security and safety. I talk about religion and politics and sex and my family and my finances and my failures. I have lost customers over all of this on occasion and worse, I’ve sometimes lost people that I thought were my friends. That’s painful and look — now I’m talking about that, too. None of this feels like a choice or strategy to me. It’s who I am.

So — who are you?

I can’t tell you a guaranteed path to success but I know for sure the path to internal misery is to fight against who you are inside. Every victory will be hollow. Every success will be meaningless. No amount of money and the nicest mattress in the world won’t help.

Pick your path wisely and with the knowledge that both have pitfalls — then just focus on the journey not the destination. Even Ferraris crash and it’s possible to O.D. on truth serum.

Either way, enjoy the ride.

Nedle Flickr image by Sinner Photography.

Guest post by Jerret Turner

I love rules. I love rules because they’re easy to follow. And obeying them leads to immediate and much approval from those who made them. In fact, I joined the military right out of high school because I wanted to be a part of the largest rule abiding class in the world.

But after 4 years of military school and 5 more years stuck in a cubicle, I questioned everything. “What am I doing? What’s the end game here?” I gave typical, weak answers. Security. Safety. Retirement. I worked hard for this. I felt like a Twinkie. Golden on the outside but a mushy, sticky mess on the inside.

I didn’t just want to do something different. I had to do something different. Before the onset of insanity. So I decided to educate myself in the world of blogging. I followed the gurus. I followed all the gurus. Following gurus in and of itself isn’t bad. The bad thing is what I call the Law of Competing Theories. This law states that your degree of mental confusion is directly (and exponentially) related to how many experts you follow.

So, the more educated I became, the more I saw how one guru’s rules didn’t jive with another guru’s rules. The competing messages were canceling each other out: Twitter is great. Twitter is a waste of time. Facebook is great. Facebook is bad. Take care of your needs. Take care of everyone else. And on and on.

One rule in particular stood out, “Thou shalt become an expert to’ be taken seriously.” I’m a shy person by nature. Painfully so at times. So it was hard for me to think I had to become the defacto expert on a topic before anyone would listen. I tried to convince myself to follow this rule. But then I’d quip back, “if this is what I’m supposed to do to be successful, why does the thought of doing it feel like total hell?” This is the inter webs, right? I should be able to be honest with who I am and still gain trust and a following? Why couldn’t I…just be me?

I realized something after I started listening to and reading the rule-questioning stuff on this blog. Nobody here is trying to be an expert. In fact, there’s even a kind of disclaimer: “Results here are not typical.” There are no guarantees. Really, the only guarantee of anything at all would be failure, if you do nothing. Anyone who calls themselves a guru is, if they’re honest, only able to say, “This is what I did. You can try it if you’d like, and maybe it’ll work for you. Maybe.”

This message — we’re talking Question the Rules here — was very anti-establishment. Every Internet Marketer newbie is chasing the magic button, the one button they can push to watch cash pour out of their computer screen. And Internet Marketing information publishers are only happy to oblige, to sell that quick fix. So why wasn’t that message here, in the realm of rule-questioning? Why would anyone put out something with no positive results guarantee?

It’s because there’s another thing that can be sold, and it’s the truth.

The truth is that success is a very personal journey, and no marketer has any clue who you are. How could they ever promise anything? People who are successful have done what THEY alone have done, and they have lessons to share. Lessons, but not commandments. No absolutes. That’s a hard thing for a rule-follower to hear.

I will never be a Chris Brogan or a Gary Vaynerchuk or Jonathan Fields. I will never be a Seth Godin or Tom Peters or whoever else guru who has a business bestseller out. I’ve always know that. But I’ve always felt I had to be like them in order to be successful. Follow the guru rules, right?

Funny thing is you rarely ever hear about the quiet people. You rarely hear about the shy people who aren’t making waves in the Internet Marketing or Web 2.0 world. There are some for sure but the vast majority of successful people you see on a day to day basis (or never see for that matter) are there because that’s them. That’s who they are.

So, where does that leave me? After listening to the recordings here at Question the Rules, I realized I will never build a successful business on becoming someone I’m not. For some people, fakery (Johnny would switch out a single vowel and make another word which works just as well) may be ok. But not for me. I’ve tried to convince myself for the last 5 years that I must become someone or something else to be successful.

After listening to Johnny and Lee riff about their trials (and hearing Lee continue to go through his – no end point to any journey, indeed), I realized I don’t have to do what I thought I should do—become someone else. I had to find my own way which, in the long run, is a much better way. And maybe not the most profitable way in the short term (gasp)!

So, I started a blog. I started a blog my way. In a niche I chose. Yes, I did some market and keyword research. I didn’t jump right in (I’m a rule follower, remember?). As shallow as it may seem, listening to guys tell me what they did — and saying that it may not work for others — was the boulder that finally knocked me over the edge. Bottom line.

Within blogging, there’s another rule—write epic posts every time you publish. You know what? I tried that and failed miserablely on a long ago, forgotten blog. So, I’m not writing epic posts. Maybe someday. Not starting out, though. Feeling like I had to write long, manifesto posts was a road block to me even getting started.

So, what the heck am I doing? I’m gathering the most interesting, contrarian, and non-boring information on my niche topic. I’ve always been an information hunter. It’s very satisfying. So, why not find the best information that’s already been written and report and comment on it? Yes, it’s against the “rules” but I’m questioning those rules, remember? And you know what? I’m not worried about monetization. I’m having a blast. I found a groove that’s given me (in a few short months) much needed mental stimulation.

I always thought people who weren’t monetizing were crazy (another rule). But now I know what it means when people talk about doing things because they love them. Doing something for its own sake. Not because it might bring in a few hundred extra bucks in Adsense earnings.

As a rule follower, not following the rules is unsettling for someone like me. But interestingly, questioning some rules and assumptions helped me to see that being true to myself is more important than following arbitrary, non life threatening rules. After years of guru reading and paralysis as a result, I went out and did something. And that, my friends, is truly epic.

Jerret Turner writes about personal finance issues from his own trials and errors. He also believes the best way to improve your personal budget is to earn more money.

Adam Baker from the site Man Vs Debt did something totally radical a few years ago; he and his wife sold nearly all their possessions and traveled the world with two backpacks worth of stuff.

Baker tells that story in his 30 minute interview and talks about his new product Sell Your Crap! — which can help you whether you want to live an minimalist lifestyle or just clean out your closet.

Downloadable MP3

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